The Privilege Levels of Love

Prologue: 

Love is a privilege, not a right. This means we should be happy and grateful if we are privileged to experience it and not get miserable or resentful if we don't "as a matter of right".

One has to earn a privilege either upfront or pay for it later somehow.

To give and to receive love are two different and distinct privileges at all levels.

We only receive all privileges, even if it is the privilege of giving.

To give love is always a greater privilege and of greater value than to receive it, at any given level.

Levels of privileges in love in increasing order:

• To love
• To be able to articulate one's feeling of love
• To be able to convey one's feeling of love to the object of our love
• To be able to do something appropriate to express our love
• To be Loved by someone
• For someone who loves us to be able to articulate their feelings
• For someone who loves us to be able to convey their feelings of love to us
• For someone to be able to do something appropriate to express their love

Note: 

The first half of the list involves giving and it completely within our own control. 

The second half is about receiving and is not within our control. We just need to let/allow ourselves be loved by others.

As you progress down the list, be thankful and grateful for each level of privilege you have achieved.

For those who like a simpler and more succinct model, instead of the verbose list above the following are the levels

• To Love
• To Be Loved

Points to ponder:

The above discussion applies to all forms of love - parental, filial, friendship or romantic.

Children are a privilege thrust upon us - both as an opportunity to experience love and a 'forced-down-the-throat-to-get-the-message' tactic of nature, if we have not figured out the priorities by our twenties (which many of us do not).

I reckon that at the end of our lives, if we happen to have the time and lucidity, we will look back and judge the value of our own lives firstly by how much we loved and only then by how much we were loved. Usually, there is a strong correlation between the two!


Copyright  (c) Kannan Narayanamurthy 2016
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