Chapter 1 - The Diagnosis
"How long do you think I have left?" he asked the doctor quietly, looking him in the eye.
For a moment, it was the doctor who averted his gaze, picked up the report that he had just read from, glanced over it again, while tapping his pen with the other hand on his lap. He seemed to be thinking, making up his mind.
In a couple of seconds he glanced up from the report, looked back directly at him, in his eyes and said,"I'd say about 18 months. I could be wrong, there have been people who have not made it that far and a few who have gone beyond. We could go through an aggressive treatment regime, it will not likely extend your life much and will take a lot out of the quality of the time you have left. It is up to you. As your friend, I will tell you honestly, I would not go through it myself. I would take a milder approach. I can surgically, remove the main blockage and it will heal in a couple of weeks. We can schedule that soon within ten days. It will likely grow come back, in about an year. Not worth operating a second time.
Look, I will not tell you not to dwell on this. I know you will. I will suggest you do everything you can to tie up loose ends, make time and spend it with family and friends. You should try and do everything you have really wanted to do and did not get to until now. As your doctor and friend, this would be my honest and sincere advice to you, Srini! "
"OK, thanks Fa!" he replied, still looking at him. Then his gaze went sideways towards the wall in the room that had no windows. He seemed to be alone with his thoughts for a few moments, just looking at the blank wall. The doctor watched him silently. He had been through many such meetings and had come to expect many unexpected ways of dealing with this kind of news that he had just delivered. He did not move, say or do anything that would break the silence. For him, too, it was a bit of a blow. Srini was a friend he had known for about 30 years, first as his doctor, then an acquaintance and then as a friend.
Slowly, after what seemed to be the longest fifteen seconds, Srini turned to look at him and said,"Fa, could you hold off telling my family for a few days? At most, give me a week, after which I will tell them myself. I know Anita will call you this evening, so will Rohan. They all know you and have always talked you. Please hold them off for just a few days. Tell them you are running some more tests. Try not to sound concerned or give it away in your tone." He rose up from his chair.
The doctor nodded, silently. He understood that people had different reasons. He got up from his chair, there were tears in his eyes that he was blinking fast to contain. He came up and gave his friend a hug, "We've all got to go someday, Srini, some a bit sooner that we expect. I'll take care of you right up to the end."
"Thanks, my friend. I know you will. I am lucky. I appreciate it coming from you. I need to hurry and attend to something waiting for me. I am a bit late..." Srini trailed off, giving Fa a squeeze as he hugged him. They were normally not like this.
"See you soon. I will call you," said Srini as they walked towards the door with the doctor's arm around his shoulders and his own around his back. They walked out the office together, into the waiting room. There was another patient waiting to see the doctor. As they parted the doctor waved to his friend,"Bye! See you soon."
Srini waved to the receptionist,"Thanks Annie! Have a good day, See you later."
Annie was a good friend too and she did not yet know. She would soon. She had a quiet suspicion.
The doctor turned to the receptionist at the counter in the waiting room and whispered ,"Give me five minutes before the next one, Annie. I'll ring you when ready."
One look at the doctor's face and seeing his losing battle to keep the tears from falling down, confirmed her worst fears. She nodded. Her eyes started to sting too.
The doctor hurried back into his office.
Srini stepped out of the building with the doctor's surgery into a bright sunny autumn day. It was cool and the sunshine was like a soothing balm applied all over, where it shone on. He relished it.
He walked over to the open, flat concrete, but beautifully patterned space between the tall office buildings. He walked purposefully to his usual routine when he came this way. He looked at a bench a little distance away, near a strip of grass and bushes. Next to it, in his usual spot, sat his friend Ben, the shoeshine man. He was an odd, but strangely accepted part of this busy, upscale business district.
Rumours were that Ben used to be one of the high-flying market sharks dealing in shares and high finance. He made a couple of bad friends and bad calls and one day, he showed up homeless and sleeping, still dressed in his business suit, under a stairwell of a building in that area. Everyone knew him and no one had the heart to throw him out or report him. Gradually, Ben's appearance transitioned into one of the typical homeless, as if in a time lapse photography series - a little everyday. He let his hair grow and now had a full, long beard. He never asked for anything, but people kept dropping by and giving him something to keep going - to eat, mostly. One day he appeared with a brand new shoeshine kit. From that day, many went to him to get their shoes shined before a meeting. They dropped a few coins on to the neat towel he had next to it. It was rumoured that the only office workers who did not dare come near him were his old work colleagues who worked in a nearby building.
Srini walked up to Ben and put his foot on the shoeshine step. There was always a folding chair available with Ben for those who wanted to sit down while their shoes were worked on, but Srini did not ask for it today.
"How are you Srini?" asked Ben barely looking up for a second and going about getting to work.
"I'm fine. How are you Ben?" asked Srini. Ben worked without looking up. He did this sometimes and was not in a mood to talk. He did not even usually bother to look at what he was paid. He simply trusted people or took whatever they gave. Srini was silent too. Ben finished up and went about putting his brushes in place, shutting the box of polish and tidying up. He usually heard the coin fall onto his rag as Srini paid him. This time he heard nothing but Srini_ say quietly in his typical voice,"Thanks Ben! Have a good weekend."
He then heard Srini walking away. He turned to see him sauntering at a little distance. There was a little breeze and something fluttering caught his eye in the periphery. He turned to his collection rag and saw a twenty dollar note, with a coin on top to prevent it from blowing away. Ben looked at the receding figure of Srini thoughtfully.
"He must have something wonderful or something terrible happen to him today. I must ask him about it the next time," he thought to himself. Ben was a wise man. He had seen a lot in life.
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